Nearly That Time Again...
0 Comments Published by Oh Wayward One on 16 March 2006 at 3/16/2006 08:42:00 am.
Oh boy, here it comes....
Date: 16 March...
Location: Anywhere, Ireland
Occaision: St. Patrick's Day. Otherwise known as "HOLD ONTO YOUR LIVERS, PADDY, DERE'S A STAWRM COMIN'!!!!"-day.
And it all begins today. A large percentage of the irish population may not even go to work today... But those that do will be able to survive the day knowing that tomorrow is a public holiday.
There will be drunkenness and debauchery in the streets that will make Mardi Gras and Carnival look like a Kindermuzik recital. Because not only is tomorrow Paddy's day (which would be normal of any 16th of March), but it is also coinscidently on a FRIDAY. Which means all the drunk pepople don't have to go to work on the SATURDAY.
Paddy's day in Ireland is something I cant even describe in words so I won't even try. Let's just say that to explain it as "everyone getting drunk" would be so grossly understated that I might as well just be writing this description in Swahili.
Rather some examples:
On Paddy's Day in Cork, we see 65 year old GRANDMOTHERS puking on the footpaths. Regularly.
On Paddy's Day in Cork, the cops have no interest in stopping public urination, as they wouldn't be able to make their way down a city block in a 24-hour time frame, having so many citations to dish out.
On Paddy's Day in Cork, the parade lasts approximately 45 minutes. The remaining 23 hours and 15 minutes are all a blackout. Shops close, not because it's a public holiday, but because they would be destroyed. 23 hours and 15 minutes is a LONG TIME to be fending off drunken psychos. Plus, remember, shopkeepers are people too. I did mention EVERYONE gets binge-til-u-puke drunk?
On Paddy's Day in Cork, you see 12 year old children slugging pints down in broad daylight, and throwing the empty glasses at cars. No one bats an eye or says a word. (and if they would, it would be something like: "aawww shurrr ye know yerselffffff shurrrrrr de lad's jessssst havvvvvinnn a laugh, like...bllrrrrrrrr")
The 18th of March has been statistically proven to have the highest percentage of no-shows and job-quitters in the entire calandar year, in Ireland.
And if it sounds like Cork throws a good riot on the 17th? Just try and spend the day in Dublin.....
Date: 16 March...
Location: Anywhere, Ireland
Occaision: St. Patrick's Day. Otherwise known as "HOLD ONTO YOUR LIVERS, PADDY, DERE'S A STAWRM COMIN'!!!!"-day.
And it all begins today. A large percentage of the irish population may not even go to work today... But those that do will be able to survive the day knowing that tomorrow is a public holiday.
There will be drunkenness and debauchery in the streets that will make Mardi Gras and Carnival look like a Kindermuzik recital. Because not only is tomorrow Paddy's day (which would be normal of any 16th of March), but it is also coinscidently on a FRIDAY. Which means all the drunk pepople don't have to go to work on the SATURDAY.
Paddy's day in Ireland is something I cant even describe in words so I won't even try. Let's just say that to explain it as "everyone getting drunk" would be so grossly understated that I might as well just be writing this description in Swahili.
Rather some examples:
On Paddy's Day in Cork, we see 65 year old GRANDMOTHERS puking on the footpaths. Regularly.
On Paddy's Day in Cork, the cops have no interest in stopping public urination, as they wouldn't be able to make their way down a city block in a 24-hour time frame, having so many citations to dish out.
On Paddy's Day in Cork, the parade lasts approximately 45 minutes. The remaining 23 hours and 15 minutes are all a blackout. Shops close, not because it's a public holiday, but because they would be destroyed. 23 hours and 15 minutes is a LONG TIME to be fending off drunken psychos. Plus, remember, shopkeepers are people too. I did mention EVERYONE gets binge-til-u-puke drunk?
On Paddy's Day in Cork, you see 12 year old children slugging pints down in broad daylight, and throwing the empty glasses at cars. No one bats an eye or says a word. (and if they would, it would be something like: "aawww shurrr ye know yerselffffff shurrrrrr de lad's jessssst havvvvvinnn a laugh, like...bllrrrrrrrr")
The 18th of March has been statistically proven to have the highest percentage of no-shows and job-quitters in the entire calandar year, in Ireland.
And if it sounds like Cork throws a good riot on the 17th? Just try and spend the day in Dublin.....
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