My Year of Meaningful (2011)

We are putting together our "Pièce de résistance"  as a company today and tomorrow (one of the things that has been keeping us up at nights, sending us to Zambia, sending us to the loony bin, etc etc for about the last 4 months) - our biggest project ever as a little company.  It's a major African Devpt Bank funded conundrum between 2 countries who can't agree - a huge EIA for a giant bridge that will be built across the Zambezi river, including a One-stop border post between the countries of BW and ZAM, and pedestrian underpasses for elephants crossing below deck, etc etc.  Whatever. Hundreds of pages have been written and figures drawn and drawings figured and what-what-what, and the Client has to have a draft tomorrow.

So it's a madhouse around here.  But almost over.

Anyway I was just thinking, as I was listening to this week's This American Life podcast - I'll remember 2009 as the year I discovered podcasts.  I downloaded a TAL episode when we were back in the US for xmas, and The Mr. and I played it in the car for the first time on the way back to BW from Joburg after landing back on African soil.  Every week since then I've happily collected my TAL, & All Songs Considered podcasts, which have now also over time blossemed into episodes of Onion News Broadcast, Mark Twain stories, Banjo video tips, Car Talk, and some others which have came and went. I got kind of nostalgic for 2009 just there for a second - don't know why.... if anything listening to all those NPR type broadcasts makes me think about how nice it would be to live in the US again at some stage and have all these things at my disposal at the flick of a button.   Well anyway, in my brief spirit of whimsy, I got online and finally got around to donating 10 bucks to TAL, since after all, I am thriving off their bandwidth and giving nothing in return.

OK so getting back to Crazy E from DC (see 2 blogs ago), the other day guess who sends The Mr. a message pleading with him for all this crap?  Yeah.  Well I told him "it's in your court now, pal", but he has the same annoyances I do.  On the other hand she did bring up a good point in her email of request to him (which she so politely managed to feign interest in our life in a few sentences within, good for her. A wee personal touch helps, as I was saying) - that good point being "it's not anything that you wouldn't already have to fill in on your entry card into the US when you fly in to visit".   True.  For the most part.  Albeit I don't remember "name of employer" being one of those questions.  But I digress!

The very next day, SuperFriend and Personal Legal Advisor Extrordianaire, SheofDC wrote me an email after reading my blog saying "that's all BS!  She obviously can't read the fed govt application - she only needs that stuff if you work for a foreign govt!" (paraphrasing, of course).  Which then took me from "over it" to "annoyed again!!!"  But also teaching me a valuable lesson:  Get this issue off the table already before it drives me insane!!!  (Which is SO anti-2010, yo!)  So I let myself have a wee rant to the boys at the office during coffee time, the next day, got it all out, re-hashed it for the last time, and have dually moved on, not even asking The Mr. whether or not he's going to comply with her orders.  Gone & forgotten.

So this weekend promises to be interesting, if nothing else.  Mainly based on the fact that I received a phone call from Frau Meister (the 74y.o. violinist from my geriatric quartet) instructing me to come to her 75th bday party, and to bring something to eat, and my viola.  With which we will play a few movements of something or other for the other party attendees.  Then there will be a meal (of the food we all bring).  There will be some drinks.  Then, she continued, she will put on a video tape of a famous violinist, und ve vill watch it!  OK!!   So that's what my posse is doing between the hours of 5 and 8pm on saturday anyway!  Whew!  No more wondering, there!

I made the mistake of, when I was repeating my instructions (for confirmation & understanding, of course) back over the phone, saying "something to drink, and something snacky" while going back over what I would bring.  "NO! Not snacky!"   This was a MEAL we're talking about here.  As in pot-luck dinner.... not snacks!!   OK!  OK!   Got it!!

I make fun of Frau Meister only because I do really love her.  She just is "that way".  But hey, she's like a 75 year old 5-foot-tall Quaker lady and in very poor health and weighs about 60lbs (not to mention an amazing violinist) so really I mustn't give her too hard a time. I have to say, the last time I moaned about being "summoned" over to play Dvorak just before Xmas and I had been so flat out busy and didn't have time to practice - I went in with a bad attitude, and ended up playing really well, and enjoying it thoroughly, and then having mega residual guilt because I had been so mean about being summoned in the first place.

OH speaking of playing can I just say I CAN NOT WAIT for July - - - as I have had no one to jam with (banjo) since Jeremy died last year, I am freaking DYING to have some sort of social playing session with ANYONE... seriously, my teeth are itching and my skin is crawling and I find myself desperately playing along to my iPod.  I'm so freaking musically lonely!!!  aghghhhhh.  So I mentioned this to Dave (back home) and he said not only would he organize a giant Hometown Basement Concert for Bangladesh with all our old buddies (in Gary's basement) for my homecoming, would I also sit in on banjo with his band for a few tunes at their gig at the Winery on the 2nd!?!!?  How much louder can you type "HELL TO THE YEAH"!!?!?! 

Well, gotta git on with this deadline now so that's all.

Labels: music, work

So basically last week was filled with a lot of card games (it's what we do to maximize the old "inlaw-outlaw relationship management plan"), a lot of me speaking my bad Dutch, and a lot of grandparents lovin' on their chocolate grandkid.

Really, I have to say, even without the Spirit of 2010 factor in place, it was all quite survivable.

Thursday we came home late after Ye Olde Animal Peeps mtg, and MIL had dinner made which was nice because there is NO WAY I could've mustered it.  I was sick.as.a.dog for nearly the whole duration of the week, but couldn't possibly stop to recover because there was too much work to do!!  I didn't even work from home once last week because my presence was required inside the office - - not to mention those inlaws would've surely distracted me (and frustrated me?) too much if I had been at home.

Anyway, Friday came around and we braaied here at the house and chilled out and probably played cards. I don't even remember anymore.  Saturday we spent the day in town and did some shopping and sightseeing and ate lunch at the tea garden and stuff and stuff and stuff.  Saturday night we were all too full to do the original plan which was to go out and eat, plus had been back and forth out of town already, so we stayed home and again ate and played cards and stuff.  I made Adelly's recipe for sausage balls, we drank some beers (even though I'm on antibiotics) and it was pretty low key.

Sunday we went out for lunch with the Swedes and again as always the inlaws refuse to be social with anyone who can't speak their language so that was a wee bit embarassing but on the other hand, the Swedes are so laid back they couldn't give a rats.  It just really irks me, that's all.  Especially knowing that my own parents would've eaten these friends of ours up, and gotten on like a house on fire.  But therein lies the difference between the kiddo's sets of grandparents. 

Sunday I was finally feeling healthy enough to do some exercise, so The Mr. and I went for a nice run (gotta love babysitters-on-tap when the grandparents are here!) and then we all went out for dinner at BWs finest chain of family friendly steakhouses (the only type of restaurant my FIL would possibly consider being suitable for him and his totally outrageously limited taste), and it all started to get a little sad around that time.

My MIL has fallen so deeply, totally, head-over-heels-edly in love with Lady JooJoo and was already getting like, terminally emotional around Sunday.  (They left Monday night)  I really do have compassion for her, I know I've mentioned this before, I feel like we have some sort of kindred spirit between us, but there's just this whole cultural boundary and THING called The FIL that prevents.... whatever.... from developing.

But I will say this, she is indeed a great granny.  Although she totally broke our "one toy" rule with flying colors (ok maybe we should've made more of an issue about it before hand), but she did mitigate that by bringing a buttload of dutch books, which I did want.  One of them is even a personalized book about this Dutch kiddie character who is a bunny called Nijntje, and in this book, Nijntje and The Joo (obviously her real moniker is used) have a sleepover, and the cutest thing is that The Joo is even illustrated as a little chocolate bunny in the book... it's so freakin cute!  But basically she's totally respectful of everything we do & how we do it in terms of El Kiddo management & procedures..., followed The Schedule right down the line, didn't dish out any unsolicited "advice".... hell, she even spoke 100% Dutch to her the whole time! And as a fellow pisces, I can completely empathise with her in terms of her emotional roller coaster when it comes to flying in, meeting her new grandkid, falling in love with her, and then having to be whisked away again.  I really felt for her and even almost kinda miss having her around and watching her & the wee pooper being so sweet to each other.  There was a lot of laughs and love and cuddles between those two.  Photos are on the 'bucket.

Now, I didn't catch this but even The Mr. was gob-smacked as we drove away from the Airport  yesterday evening en route to the hash, due to some sort of emotional remarks made by The FIL that wound up passing me by because I was busy bidding adieu to the MIL at the time it happened.  I can't really remember what it was that The Mr. said that he said, but it was something terribly uncharacteristically sappy and emotional so that was truly bizarre.  Apparently the existance of grandchildren will really mess with people!!

So anyway, we went to the hash and I got to run this week (The Mr's turn on walking duty with the kid) and it was a big ass long run which was great because I'm feeling good again and DAMN I needed to blow off some stress.  As we were having the routine Social Drinking after the run, Pete and Elaine both pounced on me and The Mr., begging us to throw our hats into the ring to join the Mis-management (the Hash's organisational committee, basically) this year, since so many positions will be opening up due to expats leaving.  AGH!  Just as we're getting rid of the Animal Peeps!!  The good thing is, this is one committee that would actually be fun and low-maintenence.  They don't even meet every month, and when they do meet, it's at the lowbrow bar in town, and they do it on rib night.  I'm thinking we could do this.  They want The Mr. to be the Brewmaster, and me to be the Grand Master (which, since I'm a girl, would actually be "The Grand Mattress").  We'll see.  We said we'd consider it.   I just want 2010 to be laid back and easy.  But they assure me it would be.  And I know since Pete is currently Grand Master, from what I've seen him have to do, it is pretty easy, and fun.  You get to dish out the Hash Shit and lead the Circle and all sorts of funny stuff, with no homework or report writing involved.  And hell, all the Brewmaster has to do is mix up outrageously disgusting punishment drinks during the circle.... how hard is that?   Like I said, we'll see.

Labels: HHH, mi familia

Seriously, how far do we go with the positivity sentiment of 2010?

My goal pretty much lies on the "if you can't say something nice, put a sock in it" side, and stays there.  But here's a doozy of a contentious issue in which I'm tempted to not say something nice, but putting a sock in it could have equal adverse impacts on a friendship...

Allow me to explain:

I should've saved the email, but it was just bugging me too much, seeing the subject title in my inbox.
Right, so like a week ago, my friend Crazy E of DC sends out this mass email (personally that already annoyed me), subject headed:  "Urgent, Please reply, Your cooperation is needed" or something like that.  Then in mass email lingo it was pretty much like (I'm paraphrasing here, since I deleted it) "if you're receiving this email it's because I want to re-enter the fed govt after my contract here is up, and you or someone you know is not a US citizen.  I am required to turn over this information for all non-citizens that I am linked to so that they can check that you are not a terrorist or on some watch list.  So, can you please send me the following information:
- full name
- address
-country of citizenship
- employers name
-address
-date of birth
etc
etc
etc

I can't remember the whole list.  But anyway then the "personal p.s.es" were at the bottom.  It was like an addendum in bullet points:

• Bob, can you send me this info for Sue
• Joe, can you send me this info for Liz
• Leroy can you send me this info for Bubba
• Oh wayward one, can you send me this info for The Mr.

etc etc  (obviously the list of names were those of us who are lucky enough to be married to, or related to, or WHATEVER to non-citizens).

OK this just annoys me on so many levels.  Nevermind the fact that I have some outrageous libertarian political beliefs but quite frankly I'm just uncomfortable with this!!  But just for the record, here are JUST A FEW of the levels that I'm uncomfortable with this on:

1. Mass, impersonal email asking ME for a favor... um HELLO, am I the only one who is picking up a twitch or facial tick whilst reading this?  OK I realize you know a lot of international people and sending each of them this email would be cumbersome for you, but come on, a little sneaky cut n' pasting instead of MASS MAIL wouldnt kill you, right?
2. Obviously, *I* am a US citizen, so since you don't need this info from me, and rather for my husband, would it not be prudent to email me asking for HIS email address instead of assuming I am his private secretary?
3. The SUBJECT HEADER of this email is like "drop everything you're doing, 'cuz it's ME TIME!!"
4. I really REALLY hate the idea of Big Brother harvesting personal details of those who are not its citizens under the guise of "your friend is relying on you giving him/her this info for their carreer". I don't believe in it, and it SUCKS.
5. Not once in the email is there any sort of "opt out" option, and that really pisses me off.

OK so there are 5 (out of many more) things that annoyed me the first time I received the email.... (yes, wait for it...)  and while I was spending a few days hashing out my ethics and my capacity to live The Spirit of 2010 and my beliefs, I receive a 2nd email from Crazy E of DC.  (again, this is paraphrased because I deleted it)
"Oh Wayward One can I ask you AGAIN to PLEASE hurry up and send me this info for The Mr.? I've already gotten 47 of my required responses and am waiting on you"...

No, that is NOT the exact wording, and there were no capital letters involved, but since I can't go back and cut/paste, that's just me re-visiting the sentiment of it.  (and yes, the number of responses returned was mentioned, and was 47).

OK so now I'm REALLY annoyed.  I'm starting to think of it less like "it's not the end of the world and this person is my friend so I should help them and just do it", and more like "OY! WTF! If I was a devout muslim and I came to your house for dinner and you were serving non-halaal meat, I would NOT EAT IT!"  As in, this really offends my Anti-big-brother beliefs and my outrageous belief in privacy protection!!  And I still haven't come up with an admirable way to deal with it that A) is in the spirit of 2010 (i.e. not zipping back with a "Screw you and your damn potential job!" or just "Homie don't play dat!")  and B) doesn't screw my friend out of a job and C) doesn't piss them off.

So I leave it for 2 days and stew. 

But then I realize I'm stewing.

And stewing is DEFINITELY not in the Spirit of 2010.

Because the more I stew, the more the negative thoughts wrap themself around my brain and start squeezing. The more I wake up in the middle of the night writhing in sheer pissed-off'edness.

So today I decided my plan of attack (inappropriate wording, I know) would be a passive email and an "option D: none of the above".   So I wrote this:
-------------------------------------
You can ask him yourself
mailto:Mr@whatever%20dot%20com

I don't believe in harvesting personal details for big brother's spying purposes!

(Sorry for the delay in response - my iPhone wasnt cooperating with my gmail and I haven't been in the office for ages).

-me
-----------------------------------

OK so there it is.  Passive, brief, sock-in-it, and topped off with a little white lie that says "I wasn't trying to be a beeyatch, it was out of my control".  -sigh-

So ultimately, there's my attempt at compromise: I've opened a door so that the info needed can be got (through the channel that SHOULD have been used the first time, IMHO), but I'm not compromising my own convictions in the process, since I still WANT to be a good friend, and yes, I know, a good friend does favors even when not over the moon about it.  And yes, I know a good friend does not do the Little White (Lie) Band-Aid thing...

ugh, I'm not good at this.  It's easier just to be a jerk.

But let it be known.... about 5 days have passed, and there has been no response - not to me OR The Mr.
Hmmm.

But I haven't been stewing anymore.  Maybe that's because the in-laws were here and I'm just too busy (& sick) to stew?  I don't know!

Labels: The spirit of 2010

How cool is it that Lady JooJoo has her own passport now!?!?
I just can't believe the last piece of the puzzle is finally in!!  Well, ok, I can believe it - and I always knew it was coming, it just took a lot of faith and patience.  2 commodities that I've never held in spades.

Anyway today I was thinking about "big stuff" (probably in the wake of all the faith and patience reward-reaping) for a change, and about some chocolate/vanilla issues... normally that kinda malarkey isn't really on my radar since she's still a baby and since we've formally "done all that" stuff in our pre-adoption counselling - discussed, planned, trouble-shot, hypothetical scenario'd everything, etc etc.  But I do regularly read this blog and sometimes it gets me thinking about what's lying in wait in our future as a mixed race family now.  I like reading the blog because it's a helpful tool for anyone who has to handle the fathoms of ignorance and insensitivity out there.... all the "don't you want YOUR OWN children some day"s and "who are her REAL PARENTS"s and all the "Don't you want to keep your own GENES in your family"s...  by reading how other people handle stuff, even not so much how the public treats you but how you deal with raising your kid is helpful.  I mean there are real issues that require real sanity-management tactics and having a community within your reach (online) of people who have been there/done that is (I'm learning) a must.   But all of a sudden today one of the bloggers started mentioning "helpful books". 

At first, I was like "hmmm... I better start ordering some of these", and was soon clicking on a bunch of Amazon links to read about these recommendations for this, that, and the other issues & topics.  But then....

...then I was reading some of the reactions/critiques of some of the books,  as well as what the books were about, and I got all freaked out.  I'm thinking there is quite possibly a community of people out there who are TOO "big issue"-oriented for my liking.  It took one review of one "transracial adoption bible" that was titled "Pity Party!" to all of a sudden stop me in my tracks and think..... yeah... is this really ME? 

I'm not REALLY sure where I'm going with this, but I think I'm very close to drawing a line in the sand about how far I.... ME... PERSONALLY.... want to go into the pool of OMG MY KID COULD POTENTIALLY BE SCARRED FOR LIFE IF I DON'T TAKE THIS MIXED RACE FAMILY THING LEATHALLY SERIOUSLY.  It's like there are times that I really get clobbered in the face (by a "look" or a comment or some general idiot stating the obvious) by this stuff, but I'm pretty sure that reading one blog (written by a community of authors not just one) is good enough/better medication for getting over those humps than actually becoming obsessive and spending half my salary on Amazon would be (trust me, there are THAT MANY BOOKS on the subject out there).  And I have to wonder if reading all that stuff wouldn't potentially stir up stuff that A) Isn't really there,  B) May not ever really affect ME or my kid, as we all raise DIFFERENT KIDS, PEOPLE!!!,  C) Just be a waste of USD$ that I would be better off spending on the Tom Petty Biography because it would make ME HAPPY.  (And *naturally* I'm a proponant of the "if mamma aint happy aint nobody happy" theory)

Hmmmm.

Also, I've never been a really big self-help-book type person.  That doesn't mean I've never read one or that I don't think anyone else should read them... I think I just prefer real life teaching to assuming that someone else's experiences are EXACTLY what I'm going throug/going to go through. Now of course that makes me sound borderline arrogant and know-it-all, but seriously, there's a gut feeling at work here.   OBVIOUSLY I'm going to have to face a bunch of challenges that the majority of the folks out there and their mini-mes don't have to encounter... but have I ever been the type of person who can't handle something unless I've read what The Experts' Advice Complete Compendium has to say about how to proceed??? 

And by elevating this topic to the pinnacle of "I have to see what THEY recommend" might I not just be setting myself up to take some other (fallible) human's (potentially bad) advice???

I'm continually second guessing my gut feeling on the subject of "It IS a big deal" or "It's NO big deal".  Because normally I'm a part of the party of the latter.  But there's someone else's future in the balance here, so my half-cocked portion of the brain is being closely monitored by my rational (1/5,000th) portion of the brain.... especially when you read stuff like "This book is useful for all parents who want their children to grow up with healthy attitudes in a world that uses race to separate human beings... and if you don't read it YOU MAY F*CK THEM UP FOR LIFE!!!!"  (ok yes that is partially a real quote).

OK so there's my deep thinking for the month, now back to our regularly scheduled blog of nonsense.

Labels: The Kid Files

What is UP with my throat these days?!?!

The infection that started my downward health spiral around new years was in my throat, and now just a mere week after I was feeling back at 100%, I've got some other jive-talkin sore throat that I swear feels like my tonsils are so swollen that they're touching each other!

But it isn't stopping me, nor CAN it stop me, because I'm on a serious deadline for work as well as too freakin busy to stop and dose myself with anything other than tea.  If anyone were to ask "how are you this fine day?" they would hear the word "BUSY!" trailing off in the distance behind me, in my 100mph wake.

Tuesday we had to wake up at the crack ass of dawn to go fetch the inlaws at the airport and then it was straight into the office for me, til something stupid like 6:45pm, then home, greet inlaws, feed inlaws, do some more proofreading for work, and hit the sack.  Then Wednesday (y'day) it was up at the crack ass of dawn again to rush to the airport again, and fly up to M-town for a day in the 300 degrees and sand, doing inspections.  Not to mention both flights included proofreading The Mr's giant report that he's neck-deep in, instead of my normal relaxing & beer drinking.  Then immediately upon arrival back in G-city, I had to do another inspection (after hours) at the airport and finally got home around 7 or something - and the same fun and games again.  Feed the baby, feed the inlaws, play cards with the inlaws, jump in the pool for 3 minutes, go to bed.

Now today I'm back at the office, deadline-deadline-deadline, rush-rush-rush, etc, and followed by Animal Peeps committee meeting at 6, HOPEFULLY out of there before 9, home, inlaws, eat, bed.  OH the fun we're having around here!

In the spirit of 2010 I must say I'm glad to have inlaws who are more than willing to babysit and will be cooking dinner for us tonight, and are only staying til Monday.  And have been on very good behaviour since they arrived.  My MIL is really good with The Joolz.... good thing too since she's raised 6 kids....!!!

OK there's my break gone. 
I really need to rent some hours in the day to do some trip planning!!  Where can I get some hours??  Seriously.  Hours?!?

Labels: work

Must be the in-laws!!!  It's time once again to revisit the exciting life & times of the outlaws in-laws that we all know and love.... ahhhhh....  here they come.  Tomorrow.  6 days of fun & games.

The New-leaf-positive-outlooker in me is saying "hey isn't it great that The Joo gets to meet her grandparentals!"  and in the spirit of 2010, we'll leave it at that, this year!

I do wonder how they're going to cope with the heat.  Seriously it is outrageous at the moment around here. 40 degrees C every day, and the odd power cuts which mean the fans don't work and you gotta keep the fridge & freezer doors shut.  Eish.  I mean I know what it means for me & The Mr....  it means spending a lot of time sitting butt ass nekkit in the pool drinking white wine with ice cubes in it.  But for them???  Let's just hope it doesn't mean a bunch of complaining and moaning.  I know my FIL will probably drink about 300 beers every day (he doesn't know that when you're hot you can drink other beverages, like this stuff called "water"  or "juice" or even "passionfruit and lemonade"... we learned this about him last year when they were here in March and it was only about 1/2 as hot as it is now & he was already dying).

Anyhoo, this was a nice weekend, except for The Mr. STILL being sick.  Friday was relaxing and I made burritos (splurge!) and talked to Adelly & Brandone & Podgey til the wee hours online, which was great fun. Then Saturday, we had a nice and leisurely slow start to the morning, including me introducing The Mr. to NPR's legendary "Car Talk" programme (which he loved, and which now thanks to my cool NPR iPhone app, I can listen to any previous episode of all NPR shows, whenever I want), while we enjoyed poached eggs on english muffins... yum.  Then, aside from going to the Kennels to check up on stuff there and some new developments and checking out the new arrivals, etc., we did some shopping and returning (of the fashion nightmare that was one of my xmas presents) & bought some amazing fish & other international goodies at our International Foods warehouse which I just adore but because of it's bizarre opening hours I never get to go to.  The fish that we bought was Dorado (aka Mahi Mahi) and some Butterfish.  I made the Dorado for dinner that night with a delightful sweet pepper and onion sauce accompanied by The Mr.'s roasted potatoes and a deeelish Italian Chardonnay that we splurged on & picked up there at the warehouse as well.  I REALLY need to catch up on all my 2009 movies that I managed to miss last year, so in order to further that objective we went to our normal video rental place with the aim to confiscate half the titles from their shelves.  Except they were gone.  Not the titles, the store!  WTF!?  Luckily The Mr. had the Capital Idea of going to another place to take out a new membership & see if we could rectify this little problem that way.  Which we did.  Except for somebody else OBVIOUSLY stole my idea because half the titles were already gone from THEIR shelves!

So we ended up with the Will Smith drama "Seven Pounds"... which despite being quite macabre, I can actually highly recommend.  Except don't ask The Mr. what he thought of it, because he fell asleep, which REALLY annoys me, but I can't do anything about.  I just realize that whenever we watch a movie at home, I will be watching it alone, 9 times out of 10.  SOMEONE has a problem keeping eyes open if the couch is involved.

Then yesterday, there was a huge decision to make:  Hash, or Braai with the Swedes & co.  Instead of a Monday hash this week, it was moved to Sunday evening + follow on dinner at an Indian restaurant.  Alternatively our Swedish friends (one couple of the many) were hosting a braai to welcome this other Swedish couple to town (he's a Dr. due to start working at our new hospital) which also sounded fun and another good way to meet more new fun people.  After waffling back and forth back and forth (because hashing IS my very favorite thing in the whole world these days) we decided to go braaiing so that's what we did.  And there were about 30 people there, many of which we knew from our friends already, and met some new ones who WERE really nice.  But the main highlight was that A) I had neglected to eat anything all day because it was SO FRIGGIN HOT I didn't even know what time it was by the time we got to the party around 4pm  and B) I seasoned these lamb chops that we brought SO FRIGGIN WELL that it was probably the most incredible eating experience I can remember in recent history.  We also brought these sweet chilli sausages that were delectible and so I stuffed myself outrageously and it was glorious.

The Kid got to see her Swedish Granny Finnstrom (of the Swedish Xmas Eve fame) there, as well as hang out with her BFF, Hilma (our friends' 1yr old).  Although H. cries & whines so much I hope she doesn't teach The Joo Joo Lady any of that nonsense.   We've already got teeth issues and I don't want to compound that with further pouting issues.  However, H. is really good for teaching her how to dip corn cobs into the drinks ice bath after every bite, to make delicious icy corn.  Mmmm.  Crazy babies.

This week is going to be a little bit nutty, what with the inlaws being here (time to turn on my 2nd language) and me having to go to Maun for work Wednesday, followed by having our "belated xmas" office dinner on Wednesday night when I get back, followed by Thursday having our 4th-to-last-EVER Animal Peeps committee meeting, and what is sure to be many hours of in-law related fun & games (including much Rummikub and card games, I'm sure).  But they leave again on Monday, so it won't be too long out of our normalcy.  That, and I'm facing it all with a positive attitude.  I'll be interested to see how they get on with the grandkid  - particularly how diciplined they are at speaking one language (NL) to her and not the other (Fr.).

So the last few days have not been so hot for The Mr. 

He got sick just before the weekend (sore throat, cold, etc), but being that A & J were coming up, he didn't quite have the self-discipline to reign in his inner party boy, and stay off the hooch.  So it kinda just kept getting worse, consistantly throughout the weekend.  Late nights, lots of beers, too much Rummikub, you know the tune.

So Wednesday he had to do a public meeting in P-town (2.5hrs away), followed by another public meeting in (our favorite) L-town (a further 3 hrs away from that).... on Thursday (today.  So as Wednesday grew closer, he was NOT getting better and was starting to Dread-with-a-capital D- the whole agenda.  You know when something is looming on the horizon that you REALLY REALLY REALLY don't want to do, and you start fearing it and dreading it so much that it makes you physically crazy? That's what we're talking about here. I couldn't really help out (although I offered to) because I had one of my big airport meetings on Wednesday... I said I would get Jr. to do my meeting and I could do his Wednesday one (but I couldn't do his Thurs. one b/c I didn't even know what that one was about).  He turned my offer down, but continued to writhe in displeasure about the situation.

And, as usual we are not keen on spending the night apart, but 5 and a half hours is a long way to drive for a 9am meeting (on thursday) so it looked like something was going to have to give, and he was going to probably stay somewhere between the two on Wednesday night.  Which would suck royal donkey balls for us.  SO, the plan was that I would go to my big meeting on Wednesday morning, and then drive up and meet him in S-town (3hrs away) and we would bunk at the Rhino Sanctuary that night, then on Thurs morning, he would drive to L-town, and I would make an early morning drive back to the office.  Night of separation avoided!

Until on Tuesday night around midnight while I was helping him prepare his presentation, we realized that he hadn't checked the lights on the truck.... so he did, and the break lights were indeed not working.  Which is illegal here, so whoever would be driving it on Weds (ME!) would likely get pulled over and have it confiscated.   Crap!!

So to make a long story short, I spent the late morning after my meeting yesterday, pulling as many strings as I could, to get some mechanical electrician to look at the truck and make it "pass the mustard" as I like to say in just enough time to get me on the road before it would be too late to arrive in time before the Rhino Sanctuary closed its gates & wouldnt let me in to spend the night with Ye Olde Hubby.  Well, I made it! Just barely!  And after a whole lot of stressing and cursing and rushing around begging people for favors, dropping Billy off with Leto (who would be doggysitting), forgetting the checkbook and having to turn around and go back, etc etc etc, myself and the wee pooper were on our way. 

So a 3hr drive later, we pulled into KRS just in time, passed a few kudu & other assorted animals en route to the cabiny-thing, got to eat dinner with The Mr. & Edwin, come back to our little cabiny-thing, enjoy a bit of our xmas present from the Chinese contractor boys (a nice bottle of red), read a chapter in our books, and pass out from exhaustion.  Then it was up at 5am to hit the road again.

Now me & The Kid are back in the office after swinging  by the house to feed the other 2 pups, and I feel like I've already worked a full day but it isn't even lunch time! zzzzz.... 
Oh well, the things we do for love!  And would do again & again, naturally!    

Labels: The Mr.

OK fer real.
File this one under "are you serious?"

This is an excerpt from a "Christmas letter" (you know the ones.... the big long 20 paragraph jobs that you write and then print off 30 copies of and address to everyone you know) that we got from our old ex-neighbours (at the old house, here), who also happen to be in the bird club with us.

I should've known to steer clear when The Mr., who forwarded it to me from our work email, wrote in the message:  "Warning: it is a pretty negative letter, reading page 3 just made me annoyed and angry, we do not need these type of letters / people / comments around us in 2010!"  But eventually after 3 weeks of ignoring it in my inbox, I gave in and had to give it a look-see. 

This is just an excerpt - the first 1/2 of it was mainly "our grandchildren are doing this, our kids are doing that, we've been travelling here and there, and what what what"...

Warning:  Break out whatever brand of humor therapy you choose, for immediate antecdote usage, after reading.
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The world stays mad. Imagine awarding the Nobel Peace prize to the President of the most aggressive nation in the world. How can Marie Theresa be compared with the leader of the world’s largest terrorist organisation? The mind boggles. So what lies ahead for 2010? Do you think that the problems with the US$ and the PIGS (Portugal, Ireland, Greece and Spain) are going to disappear and we will live happily ever after? Going by Chinese astrology, the year of the 'Yellow Metal Tiger' begins on February 13, 2010. The yellow metal has not done too badly over the last ten years, but you “aint seen nuttin yet”. The Chinese mind is hugely superstitious.... so watch its effect on gold. Or even better, act before they do and be positioned for the trade of the century. Is inflation coming or is inflation coming? Is the dollar going to crash much lower? Watch this spot.



One of the most frustrating things in our lives has been power failures on a regular basis. Our power corporation is USELESS, much like Escom and the South African authorities who inherited a first class organisation, (Interjection by me: yes, this is a veiled reference to "post-apartheid" and what "they" have "inherited") but refused to maintain and increase production levels to satisfy demand. What a combined bunch of bozos, or better still, idiots, whose incompetence will be with us for a long time! Maintenance has never been a strong feature of African culture. We have regular power outages in the mornings and evenings, so we go to bed early just like the old days....... But it has been detrimental to the baking of Christmas goodies, cakes and puddings. With no power we have no computer and no phone and no water and no TV and no oven. Candles are so useful these days.


Security where we live our idyllic retirement, has been a big issue and cause of stress. To those of you who are enthralled by the writings of Alexander McCall Smith concerning the wonderful No 1 Ladies Detective Agency and harmony in Botswana, this is akin to Alice in Wonderland. Crime prevention and case solving simply don’t exist in our community. As bad as the Botswana Power Corporation and telecommunications are, the police force is worse still. A gang of four thugs has been terrorising the neighbourhood for six months. We, us, the authors of this letter, had prowlers or break-ins on five occasions this last year. There have been two break-ins a night on average in this neighbourhood. Guess how many arrests have been made? A big fat zero. H. is now self-appointed head of security in the area and we have instituted several initiatives to combat crime, but do not expect the police to do anything, although they express keen interest in sorting out the situation.


Botswana was supposed to have been the model state of Africa. Sorry, it does not exist. We are surrounded by incompetence and ineptitude at every turn. The most depressing thing is that we have tried so hard over the years to improve the lot of competent locals. The place is shambolic. The power and security situations epitomise the whole catastrophe. And it is probably going to get worse. Our trip to the Congo this year to visit A. and R. gave us a glimpse of what could lie ahead for Botswana and SA. The only thing which has set Botswana apart is the lack of wholesale corruption. But we think incompetence will drown the nation instead. Please don’t get us wrong. There are Batswana who are intelligent, bright, with drive and ambition. Sadly there are not enough to go round.


Some of these problems are insoluble and we cannot see what to do about them. But there is much material for my evening prayers as I ask for forgiveness for my trespasses and evil thoughts and try to forgive those who trespass against me.

And now we have to write a Christmas letter of good cheer, and love thy neighbour as thyself. That is another thing. There is absolutely no hope for Africa.... (then some more stuff about family and blah blah blah)
--------------------

Riiiiight!!!
And a Merry Frickin Christmas to you, too!  O - M - G.
 
Jeeeeeeeeeeeeeez, like why don't you send me the gun to shoot myself with, in that little holiday envelope of goodies, hmmm?

It's back again:  Empty House Syndrome.... where you say goodbye to your friends who were staying with you and feel kinda sad and empty because there's a lot less bodies in the house and everything seems so quiet!

But in the Spirit of 2010: The Year of Positivity, can I just say pooh pooh to the lonliness and hoo-rah for the weekend being so great and even the Notorious Grump (AKA Uncle A.) was in good form and nary a cynnical remark was passed nor judgemental eyeball rolled!  Of course GBF Jéan makes everything better, having him here was just fantastic and I dearly miss him having him around and despise Her Majesty's United Kingdom for sequestering him over there when he needs to be *here* hanging out with ME!!

It started out great, I kicked off the weekend with lunch out with The Mr., then a phonecall to Brandiggity friday afternoon on the drive home, which segued directly into meeting the boys in my driveway as we arrived precisely at the same time... GBFJ got a young baby thrown into his arms which immediately fell head over heels in love with him.  We all planted ourselves firmly on the veranda with beers and a nice Ruby Port which he brought for us, and dined on my always famous Memphis style Pulled Pork sammidges and fries for dinner.... not much in the way of health consciousness but hey through good portion control and all that hard work over the week, I woke up the next day .8kg lighter than the day before, so rock n' roll hootchie coo for me.

Anyhoo, saturday it was sleeping til 10, hanging around for awhile drinking coffee, then we all 4 (and a half) went out for brunch at Delis and tooled around G-City a little, came home in the afternoon and went swimming, even though it was overcast and thus FREEZING (yeah, yeah, I say "freezing" when "freezing" means oh about 23C/73F... and enjoyed a bottle of bubbly in the pool before eventually heading out for Thai food at the crazy not-a-restaurant-restaurant in some guy's house in the ghetto.  Which was delicious as always.... I do love that place.  And love that it's only a 10 minute drive from our place (NOTHING is a 10 minute drive from our place!!)  It is so bizarre though.  They don't advertise, so it's only word of mouth to thank for anyone knowing it's there.... we think it's because they are harbouring these illegal Thai chefs in the back room.  It is actually someone's house.  They put a few tables up on the front porch.  Comedy! Best food in town though.  Then it was home for an attempt at Rummikub which failed due to 2/4ths of us being sick (not me!) and passing out from cold medicine, so all were in bed by midnight.

Then sunday we had my fantabulous orange cranberry coffee cake for breakfast, played some more Rummikub (for the fact that this was a pretty lame xmas present, it seems to have got a lot of action in my house - this weekend compounded with all the 3am Rummikub battles had between myself, Uncle A., and The Mr. over new years!) watched about 5 episodes of The Simpsons, and eventually pulled ourselves up and into town for tea/lunch at The President (hotel).   Then back home and it was bye-bye to J & A. as they had to mosey on down southward.

The Mr. and I and the pups took a walk in the evening to give the baby backpack-thing a test run, which was quite successful even though said "baby" seems to have a problem disappearing into the vast cavern that is said "backpack"... she didn't seem to mind though, and simply peeked out the arm holes as we bounced her violently around the agricultural valley below our house for about an hour.  I think we'll carry on with the front pack until she gets a little bigger.  Although it gave me a great workout on my ass.  Hmm, maybe it's worth trying to put a puppy in it instead, for next time...

And then back at home we had a light salad and a wee pity party for ourselves missing our buddies, and watched an episode of Rock of Love (my newest guilty pleasure.... OH I HATE IT.... OH I LOVE IT... OH IT'S HORRIBLE!) and NCIS (The Mr.'s newest obsession) and went to bed at a decent hour, hopefully to give him some hope of getting better after all this drinking-while-sick nonsense that has probably exacerbated his cold & sore throat over the weekend.   He needs to get well post haste, we have 2 public meetings for work this week, back to back, including an overnight between the two, somewhere... not sure where... and our deadlines on the Monster Project are such that he's going to see serious panic coming up to the deadline at the end of the month and probably lots of midnight oil.  Poor The Mr.

Inlaws coming next week!  Ay yi yi!

Labels: mis amigos

Looking at the next 50 weeks after the first 2 of 2010 have passed... I caught myself feeling very zen today, thinking about the lyrics.   The main point is, we're not all just trying to get through 2010, we've got big ass long lives to get through, here!!!
Long Way to Go (By Railroad Earth)
i wore my boots out walkin'
poured my heart out talkin'
i felt the pain & i broke the chain
but i still got a long way to go

been on the road ‘til tomorrow
been through the joys & the sorrows
came through the flood
& i pulled through the mud
but i still got a long way to go

been in the back-room dealin'
been on a long hook reelin'
crashed in the shed
& i woke in a sunny bed
& i still got a long way to go

been on the rails & big muddy
i've crossed the trails rocky & rutted
been down the road a million miles
but i still got a long way to go

i've traveled near & traveled far
i beat a hole in my guitar
crawled with the zeroes
& i stood with my heroes
& i still got a long way to go

been in the rain & on the run
i worked a long day in the sun
i slopped the pails
& i beat the nails
but i still got a long way to go

i tried the a verse as the b verse
i took the c verse to the chorus
rewrote & changed it
then rearranged it
& i still got a long way to go

i lost my way in darkest night
i woke again & saw the light
opened the book & i . . took a look
but i still got a long way to go

tell me what . . . what is the soul of a man?
he's got to reach up his hand
tell me what . . . what is the soul of a man?
he's got to reach out his hand
& i still got a long way to go
still got a long way to go
still got a long way to go

Labels: Appropriate tunes

I think it really IS going to be the Year of Happiness!  
That reminds me, I have to ask all my Chinese contractors what the Chinese calander says about 2010 - i.e. it might actually be possible that it really IS meant to be the Year of Happiness!

Here are some factors influencing my nominated "Year of Happiness" moniker for old 2010:

1. Everybody I know has good resolutions, and as far as I can tell, they're all being worked on
2. My BFF got engaged and is considering holding the wedding in my/our hometown (a slight feat, as she's a DC'er now, marrying an out-of-towner, er, out-of-countryer) quite possibly WHEN i'M HOME (or at least intending to be there) IN JULY... how freakin awesome is that!??!
3. The year is only 7 days in and already I've talked to Brandon on the phone like 5 times, and had a "group" gchat with him and Bella, and talked to Podgey on the phone once, and him on gchat every day so far, and SheofDC on the gchat every day too (would've been on the phone too, except on her bday when I called her new fancy-pants phone was acting belligerent!!)  I love having good friends who are an abundance of humour therapy!!
4. The Mr. has been adhering to his resolution to be less stressed, and is far more lovable and fun in this respect
5. Jéan is coming this weekend!!
6. I already have 3 international trips planned for this year
7. The Poop Machine gets to meet both sets of grandparents this year
8. The Mr. and I get OFF the Animal Peeps committee this year
9. If I can pull off my intended plan, The Mr. gets to experience a real live smalltown-USA 4th of July
10. I am going to spend more money on myself this year, and go out for lunch more too!!

All things that make one person, yours truly, more happy.  Ta-daaa!

Labels: 2010

Can I just say how I am over the moon about how almost everyone I know has very excellent NY's resolutions this year.  I have a good feeling about 2010 and I am double-proud most of all of Brandon and his Life Overhaul 2010 that puts me to shame in terms of comprehensive awesomeness.

But otherwise, it's that time again where my friend Dave sends around his big-ass group email soliciting musical inspiration for the new year.  I think there's about 30 people on our list and I always end up finding myself some good booty out of the lot.  Just for the record, this is what Dave's got going on from 2009:

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Dave’s Annual New Music Extravaganza and Winter Clearance Sale



Many of you know that I have the Little Feat lyrics, “Two degrees in bebop, a PhD in swing; he’s a master of rhythm, he’s a rock ‘n roll king” in my signature line. This, of course, is tongue and cheek, as I hold none of these degrees or titles, but I do aspire to them! But I rely on my music-loving friends to help me to learn the music ropes of the times. So again, I come to you with questions about the world of music (and, yes, I just got Christmas and birthday iTunes gift cards).

This year I want your thoughts on three areas:

Two best new CDs, LPS, cassettes, 8 tracks, etc. you encountered this year. Give me the name of the band, the name of the album, and a brief review (if there’s a web link to the recording, all the better).


What were two songs – new to you – that you have not been able to shake all of 2009? Artist and song (and a little about it, please).


As always, what album from the past came back into your life – or came to you for the first time?

As always, please reply to all! (I’ll put a final compilation together in a week or so).

Here’s my feeble attempt (again, tipping my hat to my main musical resources Kelly and Adrienne):

Two best albums:


The Shins “Chutes Too Narrow.” It’s not a new album by any means -- coming out in 2003 -- but musically, it’s just a pop treat, and it was new to me. Great melodies, clever hooks, and lyrically strong. (“Kissing the Lipless” http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l5H2E1zvQhI&feature=related)

The Decemberists “Hazards of Love.” (released March 2009) The critics liked, but didn’t love “Hazards,” and I can see why. It was hard to top “The Crane Wife, (and this doesn’t), but it’s still a great album. Seeing them at the Blue Note for what was probably a Top Ten all-time show for me probably moved this selection up the list. Still doing their high concept album stuff, but this one is slathered with guitar. (Here’s a taste: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fp_MVc3abXU&feature=related)


Two singles you couldn’t shake:


“Wild Mountain Nation” Blitzen Trapper. Channeling The Band, the Grateful Dead, and about 15 other artists of similar ilk, Blitzen Trapper is my current favorite throwback band. http://s0.ilike.com/play#Blitzen+Trapper:Wild+Mountain+Nation:7821309:s1929430.11204473.20188534.0.2.23%2Cstd_629d4ac575b14d3faf70ba3b3f80fe9c

“Go On, Say It” Blind Pilot. Like Blitzen Trapper, I have to give a nod to Adrienne for introducing me to this one. She listens to an online program called “DayTrotter” which introduces new music (from a live studio recording). They then post the live recordings for free downloads. This is a very simple song, but appeals to my singer-songwriter sensibilities. http://www.daytrotter.com/dt/blind-pilot-concert/20030774-3738086.html


Album that has come back from the past:


Iggy Pop “New Values” In 1979, I started school at Mizzou. My brother Jack was living in Columbia at the time and I remember him playing Iggy Pop for me. I knew about Iggy, but really hadn’t paid much attention, but I bought the album “New Values” and loved it. It’s been on the shelf for a long time, but I recently bought it on iTunes and can’t get over it. It’s a little inconsistent, but there are five songs that are pure gems. Just for fun, here’s a recording of “Five Foot One” http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8SvngIbImus (and one of “I’m Bored” http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rGDb8X8limY&feature=related)
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And here, for the record, was my 2 cents:

Two best new CDs, LPS, cassettes, 8 tracks, etc. you encountered this year. Give me the name of the band, the name of the album, and a brief review (if there’s a web link to the recording, all the better).



Only two?! This was a great year (or should I say "2008" was, actually - since I'm always behind) for music, but if you insist...! I'll take one from the beginning of my year and one from the 2nd half. And I'll be good and stay within one year of the present, for once.


Band: Mudcrutch
Album: Mudcrutch
Released: 2008

This is Tom Petty's "boyhood" band that, while it does include 2 Heartbreakers, brings back his old pals/bandmates from Gainesville for the proverbial "basement jam" that never quite got them famous back in the olden days - albeit finely polished in the studio and with excellent production. It's part covers (Shady Grove, June Apple, 6 Days on the Road, etc), part originals, all very much more bluegrassy and folky than normal TP stuff but with that same rock n' roll undercurrent that makes it impossible to forget who is the driving force behind the album. Childhood mates, now older, fatter & balder, back together jamming just for fun and not contract obligations, without pretentiousness, etc. It's just a great story and the album is a lot of fun. I think this song was a single in the US (?) : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aXMllRDBQvk&feature=related

Band: Railroad Earth
Album: Amen Corner
Released: 2008

I don't know what to say about this album except for it's just close to perfect. For anyone not familiar with Railroad Earth, picture Split Lip Rayfield and The Jayhawks going away for an intense working seminar in the Appalachians under Levon Helm & Robbie Robertson, and this is what they sound like when they come back to society??? Everyone has a hard time pigeonholing this band, so I'm not going to be able to do any better, but let's just say here's a little bit of what they can do: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aXMllRDBQvk&feature=related (don't get used to the horns though - it's not a standard part of the band, but it does illustrate how they are all extremely multi-talented and you'll never know what kind of instrument you're going to get on the next song) and http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7NTUYeTulYw. P.S. Anyone under the impression that these guys are what they call a "jam band" (gag!) must just be aware that no song on this album exceeds 7 minutes.


2. What were two songs – new to you – that you have not been able to shake all of 2009? Artist and song (and a little about it, please).


Artist: The Hold Steady
Song: Stay Positive
Released: 2008

Having this tune as my ring tone doesn't help the "not able to shake it" factor. I discovered this album/band early in the year due to "All Songs Considered" (a podcast I only just subscribed to in January AFTER the Annual Online Luther Music Discovery Seminar). What can I say, it's real Rock n' Roll in a period of what I'm beginning to get frustrated and sick of in terms of wussy spineless whining over synth-noise or as Bob Boilen insists on calling *absolutely everything*, "folk". At this rate, he'll have that gosh-dang Animal Collective in the "folk" category by the end of the year. And then I'll hang myself. I love The Hold Steady so much, though, that I keep listening, always hoping for another one of these gems. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FY3V4ObYRsA (Side note: I also did kinda appreciate Blitzen Trapper this year, same song as you, Dave)

Artist: The Black Crowes
Song: Good Morning Captain
Released: THIS YEAR! OMG!

I would've put this album (Before the Frost...) in the first category because it is a FANTASTIC "reason-to-believe-in-rock-n-roll-again" new album, but I'm trying to stick to the rules. So I'll take the best song off of it (and I LOVE that song) and use it here to at least make sure the Crowes get their mention! This song is definitely the way to wake up in the morning. It's like the Allman Bros got a banjo player in their "Enlightened Rouges" phase for a ragtime-influenced song, and everybody got equipment "that goes up to 11". The production on the album is amazing (and no doubt influenced by the spirit that hangs around in Levon Helm's barn in Woodstock, NY, where it was recorded - live) and the musicians are great. In fact this is my favourite Crowes album since ...Money Maker waaay back in the day, it's just great. See for yourself: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U2c9ciPYlCE (this is a live performance unfortunately missing the banjo from the studio version).

3. As always, what album from the past came back into your life – or came to you for the first time?

Artist: Bob Dylan
Album: Nashville Skyline
Year: 1969

I listened to a lot of Dylan this year for some reason. But this one I hadn't heard in so long - it gave me goosebumps to hear that jangly sound and awesome piano and rhythm section that he got for this album. Upbeat, uptempo, romantic Dylan with fantastic production for that period, the kind where every instrument can be seperated out by ear and enjoyed individually. Did I mention I love these backing musicians? The relaxed drumming of Kenny Buttrey, Bob Wilson's raggedy piano, Pete Drake's pedal steel, and of course the legendary Earl Scruggs on banjo on "Nashville Skyline Rag".

Labels: 2010, music

Everyone is gone!
Well except for me, The Mr. and The Joo and The Pups.

One thing I'm going to attempt this year (2010) is to put one of the classic "mom rules" into place, and I highly encourage everyone else out there to do the same.  That old adage is:  "if you can't say anything nice, PUT A FRICKIN SOCK IN IT!"     After spending the last 2 weeks with someone who is (in my humble opinion) the dead opposite of the eternal optimist (what would that be?  "temporary pessimist"?), I can see how one's negativity and constant half-empty attitude can weigh on those around us.  Lesson learned.  And I don't want this to be a pot-kettle thing, I'm saying it's something that *I* can use work on too.  It's too easy to just break the silence with a complaint or a negative judgement of something.   It's easier to say "OMG I HATE the idea of going back to work tomorrow" (which believe me, has been sitting on the tip of my tounge for days now) than it is to actually take on the mental task of searching for something optimistic or complimentary to say....  not necessarily about work or the end of the holidays or anything, but even something as arbitrary as "Damn! I sure do love me some cherry tomatoes!" would work, and it doesn't color everybody else's atmosphere BLACK.

I'm just realizing this is going back to my favourite Gandhi quote that I've blogged about before, dammit, it's so easy to slip: "Keep your thoughts positive because your thoughts become your words. Keep your words positive because your words become your behaviors. Keep your behaviors positive because your behaviors become your habits. Keep your habits positive because your habits become your values. Keep your values positive because your values become your destiny!"

Here are some alternatives I have encountered just in the last 24 hours where I could see that this would've come in handy (heard throughout the house - not just attributed to me or any other one person):
"I dont want to go to work tomorrow"
"I just feel so out of shape and lame"
"Don't you think she's ugly?"
"You'll never be able to pull that off"
"It'll probably all just go to shit anyway"
"I hate gardening"

OK I'm sure it all depends on context, and I realize that in the right situation/circumstances, any one of the above could've been a perfectly pleasant conversation starter or totally relevant and lovely.  But I know the context(s) here, and trust me, it was all doom & gloom & moan & groan.  And the main point:  TOTALLY UNNECESSARY!  Bringing no quality to the room, atmosphere, etc.  Seriously, I mean what value?

Anyway, just an observation and room for improvement.
I just discussed the above (after I had written it, and before finishing) with Brandon and realize that it is not a solution to the root cause of general unhappiness - for that, you have to work on the deep stuff - but what my point is, is that it's a quantifyable "doable" way to combat general negativity.  That by simply self-censoring 3 sentences a day (such as the above), you automatically subtract the general amount of negativity in the universe by 3.  It's the first step on the path to Gandhi's mantra.  And how is that a bad thing?  It's a good thing, it's something do-able.  Right, so I'm at least making an attempt.

Labels: 2010

I can't believe I haven't been writing in here for over a week - my goal for the xmas holidays was to spend a crap load of time online catching up with stuff like blogs and gchat and skype and email and what the hell.... it's almost over!

Anyway, it's been a pretty successful break, notwithstanding the fact that I sit here typing this with some sort of blood infection (at least it's not Malaria, which we were worried could be the culprit due to the fact I'd been stomping around in the jungle in Zambia where the little bastard mosquitos live) and on a few different kinds of meds and off any kind of alcohol for the next week or so :(

Christmas eve with the swedes was a big day of lotsa fun,  it started out with a last minute phone call from our friends and fellow hashers P&E, who invited us over for a quick drink before we hit the nordic festivities, which worked out great since they were just around the corner from our swedish friends who were hosting the big hoo ha.  I chose this moment to announce to rude-antisocial-houseguest/stand-in sibling "we are not 'dragging' you to these things so if you want to go, you're welcome but if you're going to refuse to talk to people and make it clear that our friends are not cool enough for you, then please dont feel obligated to come".  I think that got the message accross because it was somewhat smooth sailing after.  Swedish friends No.2 (the hosts) had their sons over from the homeland for the festivities who are round about A's age, anyway, so that helped a bit and he forced some small talk to ensure compliance with the newly laid-down law.  Good.

P&E gave the Joolz her first present (I had refused to do presents for her this year since she doesn't need anything and doesn't understand anyway) but it turns out these little stacky-blocky things are a big hit in babyland so she's sorted.  Anyway, we had our drink there and moved on to the scandinavian xmas eve dinner.  Everyone was in a good mood, The Kid's stand-in-Swedish-grandfather took her for her first swim, we all ate big time, there was singing, etc, and we called it a night.  Really fun.  Even more fun was coming home and getting rescued from the kitchen preperation for the next day by the opportunity to phone Brandon and have a much-needed catch-up for over an hour (finally with good enough reception that we could actually HEAR each other).  Now see THAT is the kinda stuff I wanted out of this break!!  Honestly I really have this fascination, now that my course is over and I'm not at work, to lounge around and talk on the phone all day!  It just sucks that my phone connection blows, and that no one is ever around when I can call them!!

Xmas day was bittersweet.  The Mr. pulled one of these last-minute-grab-anything christmas shopping acts and I wound up with a bunch of bits & pieces including an ill-fitting shirt that makes me look as if I'm some sort of safari company employee, and a game of Rummikub.  Riiiight.  Let's not go there. Xmas isn't about presents but needless to say it still speaks volumes when someone says something like "oh I would really love the Tom Petty biography or Season 3 of 30 Rock on DVD", months in advance, and the xmas tree turns up things like "small garden trowel" and "grocery store impulse aisle paperback of CSI: The TV Show".  WHATEVER!

It was good, however, because my giant turkey dinner which I stayed up til 1am preparing (blessed by the help of The Mr., so at least that's some redemption) the night before, turned out fantastic, and Swedish friends No.1 who were over to spend the day with us had the time of their lives (being totally unfamiliar with an English style xmas).  We all swam and ate and drank and made merry, and the kiddos (they have 2 littlies) had a ball too.  Only problem being I'd had a sore throat for a day or 2 prior, and was still feeling it. 

Now, the problem here is that for the last week I've had no idea what day it is, ever, and nor do I care so I can't really give a day by day run down of what's happened but let's just say "in general" it's been like this: lots of drinking with The Mr. & A., lots of movies watched, a game of (blank stare) Rummikub played, runs run, meals skipped, loads of reading, and sleeping.  All good elements of a do-nothing holiday. 

So the day after Boxing Day, A's friends D&T came up from Jozi and we had a nice dinner of leftovers with them (I really like them - and they're very social and polite) and then inducted them into the dogsitting and housewatching and garden watering that they would be doing for us for the next 3 days that we would be off camping.  A really late night with those guys, which was really fun (i have honestly never drank so much wine as has been consumed in the last 2 weeks before) although it culminated with The Kid having a horrible night full of screaming and waking everybody up because she had some sort of fever and Lord knows what else - good timing, Kid, right before camping.  But the next day she seemed to be ok and we headed out to the bush for a few days up in the Southern T-block, to break in the new camping trailer.  They let us bring Billy too, which was great. 

Camping was a success with the new trailer - it's great to have the giant fold-out table, and to have the smaller roof tent as well as all that space in the truck now.  Anyhoo we were on the banks of the L. River and had crocs and hippos and snakes and all sorts of game around us.  Our spot was under a ginormous grove of shade trees where it was thankfully 10 degrees cooler than out in the sun.  So again, lots of drinking and reading and laying around and poking fun at A and his new girlfriend back in SA whom he's been away from for several days now and made for good teasing fodder.  On the 3rd day we looked in The Joo's mouth to find 4 gigantic swollen bumps in her gums that are clearly big fat teeth raring to burst through and lo and behold I think we found the answer to that horrible night before we left.  Poor thing.  But I don't think she really cares that much, she was enjoying being dirty and sitting by the fire and playing with Billy. Sleeping in the truck was even a success once we learned the key was making a bed for her in the back-back, not on the middle seat.
Voila.  But I was still not feeling 100%, tired all the time, continued sore throat, and slowly deteriorating. Feeling generally bleh.

On the drive home yesterday (NYE), it all came crumbling down and I started hallucinating, feeling like someone was squeezing my head, and just generally dizzy as shit.  However, I was not going to accept this, because we had a big NYE Hash event to go to, I had potluck dishes to make for it, and we were coming home to D&T the houseguests who I had to be social with.  So I figured I would wait til today to have The Mr. take me to the hospital to get tested for the Big M.  Until I broke a sweat walking up stairs and then the whole room started melting into some spinning psychedelia.  Gave up, went to the sickyhouse, and got jabbed a couple times.  Waited for the results while the early hours of NYE were passing us by, and just before all the drunk driving & fireworks victims started arriving, they told me I was clear for Malaria but had the whole infected blood thing and turned me loose. 

So we went home and graciously (much to the pain and suffering of The Mr who was SOOoooo looking forward to the full moon hash) told the 3 guys that they were welcome to leave us and go off and party hearty wherever they pleased etc., but they insisted on staying and just having a wee house party at our place and making the traditional Dutch oil balls with the Mr. while I laid like a limp rag on the couch out on the veranda and tried my best to participate in the conversation.  But I ended up drifting in and out of sleep all night and despite my efforts felt really guilty about being a lump of nuttin on the new years eve.  Nevertheless at midnight everyone was good and liquored up and from our veranda you could see the whole city below and it turned out to be a brilliant view of the fireworks (which we didnt even know, bc we've never been here on NYE) which made the whole staying-at-home thing worth it.  Well, except for me as I didnt even get a glass of bubbles.  :(

So on to this year - I can't really be bothered making new years resolutions because I'm kinda draggin', but I've heard The Mr. say it several times over: the year of positivity, the year of happy, the year of casting negative vibes out the door.  So with that I must pick up my ill and melancholy self, a little bit annoyed at some of the last days of 2009 and thoroughly annoyed with the last 3-4 months of 2009, and dust it off and do the C'mon Get Happy dance.

Good things to look forward to this year:
Cape in Feb.
Aus at Easter
World Cup Football 2010 South Africa
USA in July (?) - which, I've decided, with ample planning and effort CAN be as good as Xmas 2008!
Finishing my thesis and becoming Master Master
Being mindful
Being at peak fitness and finding a road race to train for
Being part of the Hash, a group of folks I have grown enamoured with & look forward to seeing each week
Seeing friends, seeing friends, seeing friends!!
Making time to talk to friends either online or on the phone
Harvesting the biggest buttload of home grown veggies out of my own garden, all year
Xmas 2010 in NL, which, with ample planning and effort CAN be *almost* as good as Xmas 2008!

Labels: 2010, HHH