not rocket science
2 Comments Published by Oh Wayward One on 20 April 2007 at 4/20/2007 08:36:00 am.
It's true I know people back home who believe that the concept of (gasp!) gun control is a terrible thing (as I forget so often, I do come from Missouri). I know libertarians who think we should be able to keep AK47s in our basement bunkers without anyone telling us we can't (Duh... went to school in Wyoming). Remember that scene in "Bowling for Columbine" where Moore says to Mr. (random redneck dude's name evades me): "The Constitution says you've got the right to bear arms. What do you think 'arms' means?" and Mr. Whatever goes:
"It means we ought to have handguns if we want to!" and Michael Moore says: "What about nuclear weapons? Should you be able to have weapons-grade plutonium?" ???? Well, I'm pretty damn sure I know people who would say "SIR, ABSO-F**KIN-LUTELY, YES SIR!"
With all the bloody brilliant things about living overseas, the thing that often becomes the most tiring is when something completely retarded and outrageous happens back in the good old U.S. of A. and then *I* have to take the rap for it, as somewhat of an "ambassador" (yeah right, as if!) for the country. There's nothing I can do about it, it's just part of what people like me sign on for when we hit the road, and most of the time it's relatively short-lived and bearable (well, with the exception of Australia - eesh. Those guys are vultures and I was there during the first Bush tenure. GAH!!!)
But I'll be honest, situations like this VA Tech thing hit the international news waves, the fallout occurrs, people want ME to tell them "why is it possible that this guy can just walk into a wal-mart and kit himself out with enough guns and ammo to take out multiple classrooms in 10 minutes? Why? Why is it that YOUR country allows this? Why do YOU let these things happen, after Columbine, after that Washington-state thing, after ALL these things?"
Ugh! Pain in the friggin HOLE, I tell you. So basically, after launching into my 30-second PSA about how I am completely AGAINST the so-called "constitutaional right to be able to walk into any walmart/pawn shop/bass pro shop and buy guns and ammo without so much as a hunting license before you're even 21" (in VA, apparently, a 12-year-old can legally buy an assault rifle, even without parental permission, every 30 days, according to the Brady Campaign), and that I actually agree with their notion that I come from a country of gun-toting-for-no-good-reason maniacs, I have to pretty much just shut up and bend over. It really is nonsense.
Sometimes, while I'm bending over, I shout out "I AM NOT THE NRA! I SWEAR!!" Because who do we get soundbytes of on all the news channels when god forbid, america has a mini, pseudo gun-control backlash moment (because it never lasts more than 5 minutes) after these Virginia Tech situations (the fifth school shooting to take place in the U.S. in the last 12 months) occur? FRIGGIN CHARLTON "turd sandwich" HESTON. NRA slogans. blah blah guns dont kill people blah blah. Oh yeah, that's representative. The news-readers basically come on and say: "This is America's voice. Here we have Mr. Heston, he represents how people in america think after the Virginia Tech massacre". sweet.
Yep, we get the Bubba-guy off the street who gets interviewed on BBC International, and starts off with: "Some would say that it is guns that cause tragedies like yesterday. Well, y'see, I would say that it is the lack of guns that allow incidents such as this one to happen! " greaaaat. Thanks and let me just pad my poop-hole one more time before I go out into public this morning.
Call me anti-american but the only 2 countries I've ever lived in or even visited for that matter, where any fool (and I don't buy the pathetic "background check" element as a sufficient fool-filter) can walk into wal-mart and walk out a potential murderer, are the USA and South Africa. And guess which 2 countries have repetitive school massacres and mass shootings? Hell you don't have to have a PhD in geography to figure that one out.
Mr. Sandwich would, at this point, raise the issue that "if one a' them thar psychos wanna kill someone, they dont need no gun to do it, y'all! Outlawin' guns aint gonna fix nuthin! Them psychos can murder summun with a dern butter knife ifn's they wanna!" (ok I know he doesnt talk like that but this is my blog and I desire to make him appear to be the obvious douche bag that he is). My only reply is "OH YEAH? HOW MANY "MASS BUTTER-KNIFING MASSACRES HAVE YOU HEARD OF RECENTLY IN GREECE?!?!? Or Botswana... or New Zealand... or...." ugh.
let 'em go at each other with butter knives. let's see how many Columbines we have in the new "butter knife" era. great.
It's times like these you just gotta revert to Michael Moore:
"Why not use Gandhi's way? He didn't have guns, and he beat the British Empire."
"It means we ought to have handguns if we want to!" and Michael Moore says: "What about nuclear weapons? Should you be able to have weapons-grade plutonium?" ???? Well, I'm pretty damn sure I know people who would say "SIR, ABSO-F**KIN-LUTELY, YES SIR!"
With all the bloody brilliant things about living overseas, the thing that often becomes the most tiring is when something completely retarded and outrageous happens back in the good old U.S. of A. and then *I* have to take the rap for it, as somewhat of an "ambassador" (yeah right, as if!) for the country. There's nothing I can do about it, it's just part of what people like me sign on for when we hit the road, and most of the time it's relatively short-lived and bearable (well, with the exception of Australia - eesh. Those guys are vultures and I was there during the first Bush tenure. GAH!!!)
But I'll be honest, situations like this VA Tech thing hit the international news waves, the fallout occurrs, people want ME to tell them "why is it possible that this guy can just walk into a wal-mart and kit himself out with enough guns and ammo to take out multiple classrooms in 10 minutes? Why? Why is it that YOUR country allows this? Why do YOU let these things happen, after Columbine, after that Washington-state thing, after ALL these things?"
Ugh! Pain in the friggin HOLE, I tell you. So basically, after launching into my 30-second PSA about how I am completely AGAINST the so-called "constitutaional right to be able to walk into any walmart/pawn shop/bass pro shop and buy guns and ammo without so much as a hunting license before you're even 21" (in VA, apparently, a 12-year-old can legally buy an assault rifle, even without parental permission, every 30 days, according to the Brady Campaign), and that I actually agree with their notion that I come from a country of gun-toting-for-no-good-reason maniacs, I have to pretty much just shut up and bend over. It really is nonsense.
Sometimes, while I'm bending over, I shout out "I AM NOT THE NRA! I SWEAR!!" Because who do we get soundbytes of on all the news channels when god forbid, america has a mini, pseudo gun-control backlash moment (because it never lasts more than 5 minutes) after these Virginia Tech situations (the fifth school shooting to take place in the U.S. in the last 12 months) occur? FRIGGIN CHARLTON "turd sandwich" HESTON. NRA slogans. blah blah guns dont kill people blah blah. Oh yeah, that's representative. The news-readers basically come on and say: "This is America's voice. Here we have Mr. Heston, he represents how people in america think after the Virginia Tech massacre". sweet.
Yep, we get the Bubba-guy off the street who gets interviewed on BBC International, and starts off with: "Some would say that it is guns that cause tragedies like yesterday. Well, y'see, I would say that it is the lack of guns that allow incidents such as this one to happen! " greaaaat. Thanks and let me just pad my poop-hole one more time before I go out into public this morning.
Call me anti-american but the only 2 countries I've ever lived in or even visited for that matter, where any fool (and I don't buy the pathetic "background check" element as a sufficient fool-filter) can walk into wal-mart and walk out a potential murderer, are the USA and South Africa. And guess which 2 countries have repetitive school massacres and mass shootings? Hell you don't have to have a PhD in geography to figure that one out.
Mr. Sandwich would, at this point, raise the issue that "if one a' them thar psychos wanna kill someone, they dont need no gun to do it, y'all! Outlawin' guns aint gonna fix nuthin! Them psychos can murder summun with a dern butter knife ifn's they wanna!" (ok I know he doesnt talk like that but this is my blog and I desire to make him appear to be the obvious douche bag that he is). My only reply is "OH YEAH? HOW MANY "MASS BUTTER-KNIFING MASSACRES HAVE YOU HEARD OF RECENTLY IN GREECE?!?!? Or Botswana... or New Zealand... or...." ugh.
let 'em go at each other with butter knives. let's see how many Columbines we have in the new "butter knife" era. great.
It's times like these you just gotta revert to Michael Moore:
"Why not use Gandhi's way? He didn't have guns, and he beat the British Empire."
Not that I want to get into a big argument with you about this issue, but don't feel the need to stereotype all the U.S. "gun nuts" as rednecked, mouth-breathing Bubbas. You've got another 2nd Amendment proponent right here in a Master-degreed, well-read, Hispanic female!
Love you anyway, hope you still love me!
ha!
I knew I'd hear back from you on this one. You're a law-enforcement officer. You get to have as many as you want.