Annnnnnd we have won!
It seems we've beaten the epidemic of Cranky Husband Syndrome at the home for wayward children. Ever since the business has somewhat exploded and my dear sweet workaholic baby has become consumed by stress due to his unavoidable Dutch breeding, it's been complicated and a truly bouncy ride when it comes to just getting along.
Well, the workload hasn't changed, and none of MY proposed 12-step strategies have worked, so who would've thought that making one slight change to one's lifestyle would be the saving grace that would bring us back down to loveland and solve all our problems?? Honestly, I'm having a hard time believing it too. but we're going on the 2nd week of success here, so I don't feel like I'm jumping the gun by saying "it's all good, at last", I feel like this could be the ticket!
The secret has actually been him getting up a little earlier every morning. Just that extra hour with the birds and the not-sweltering-hot death sun is making all the difference in the world. He can bang around the swimming pool pump/chemistry maintenance, read through his course material over his peaceful cup of coffee, organize some accounts for the Animal People, make an early phone call or two, and just come to life at his own pace. I'm amazed. I'm seriously, unbelievably amazed. Then he comes in and wakes me up NICELY and it's like he's a different person. There's no tension and stress explosions and "I won't be eating lunch today as I have to do A, B, C, D... so just GO BY YOURSELF!", none of this "No I refuse to get my eyes tested, I'm TOO BUSY!", no more "we should never have started that %$#*ing Setswana class! I can't handle it!"... basically no more "I'm TOO BUSY to be nice!!" mentality that I've been having to troubleshoot for like, weeks now. And all because he gets a little "me time" first thing in the morning and can clear his mind. I'm just shocked it was that easy and doesn't involve me having to work *my* ass off to achieve the ultimate goal, here. All I can say is Hallelujah!!
There's been one or two backslides along the way, such as a little "I refuse to go to the gym with you during lunch because I have A,B,C, and D as TOP PRIORITY" explosions (particularly when I can categorically prove that A,B,C, and D are in fact NOT matters of life and death - it's just that when you're Dutch anything on your T0-Do List is TOP PRIORITY MATTER OF LIFE AND DEATH. But interestingly enough, those came on days when his early-morning hour of solace were used to do WORK STUFF, instead of Me-Stuff. Interesting indeed!
Anyway, I'm a happy girl and he appears to be becoming more of a happy boy. Now if we could both just reach the ends of our respective courses (my semester ends in early Dec., his whole diploma is finishing in Nov... WOO HOO!) then hopefully that will also alleviate some of the pressure pushing down on me, pushing down on you... da da da da. And then there will be holidays... ahhhhhhhhhhh
In the meantime, we had a weekend full of studying and working and Animal Peopleing as well as a visit from a ginormous Nile Monitor lizard in our backyard. Now THAT was surreal. I'm still kind of in mourning that he didn't make it. :'(
It seems we've beaten the epidemic of Cranky Husband Syndrome at the home for wayward children. Ever since the business has somewhat exploded and my dear sweet workaholic baby has become consumed by stress due to his unavoidable Dutch breeding, it's been complicated and a truly bouncy ride when it comes to just getting along.
Well, the workload hasn't changed, and none of MY proposed 12-step strategies have worked, so who would've thought that making one slight change to one's lifestyle would be the saving grace that would bring us back down to loveland and solve all our problems?? Honestly, I'm having a hard time believing it too. but we're going on the 2nd week of success here, so I don't feel like I'm jumping the gun by saying "it's all good, at last", I feel like this could be the ticket!
The secret has actually been him getting up a little earlier every morning. Just that extra hour with the birds and the not-sweltering-hot death sun is making all the difference in the world. He can bang around the swimming pool pump/chemistry maintenance, read through his course material over his peaceful cup of coffee, organize some accounts for the Animal People, make an early phone call or two, and just come to life at his own pace. I'm amazed. I'm seriously, unbelievably amazed. Then he comes in and wakes me up NICELY and it's like he's a different person. There's no tension and stress explosions and "I won't be eating lunch today as I have to do A, B, C, D... so just GO BY YOURSELF!", none of this "No I refuse to get my eyes tested, I'm TOO BUSY!", no more "we should never have started that %$#*ing Setswana class! I can't handle it!"... basically no more "I'm TOO BUSY to be nice!!" mentality that I've been having to troubleshoot for like, weeks now. And all because he gets a little "me time" first thing in the morning and can clear his mind. I'm just shocked it was that easy and doesn't involve me having to work *my* ass off to achieve the ultimate goal, here. All I can say is Hallelujah!!
There's been one or two backslides along the way, such as a little "I refuse to go to the gym with you during lunch because I have A,B,C, and D as TOP PRIORITY" explosions (particularly when I can categorically prove that A,B,C, and D are in fact NOT matters of life and death - it's just that when you're Dutch anything on your T0-Do List is TOP PRIORITY MATTER OF LIFE AND DEATH. But interestingly enough, those came on days when his early-morning hour of solace were used to do WORK STUFF, instead of Me-Stuff. Interesting indeed!
Anyway, I'm a happy girl and he appears to be becoming more of a happy boy. Now if we could both just reach the ends of our respective courses (my semester ends in early Dec., his whole diploma is finishing in Nov... WOO HOO!) then hopefully that will also alleviate some of the pressure pushing down on me, pushing down on you... da da da da. And then there will be holidays... ahhhhhhhhhhh
In the meantime, we had a weekend full of studying and working and Animal Peopleing as well as a visit from a ginormous Nile Monitor lizard in our backyard. Now THAT was surreal. I'm still kind of in mourning that he didn't make it. :'(
Labels: BW-general, stress management, The Mr.
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