Why Me? (and, How to finish off a Birthday in Style)
0 Comments Published by Oh Wayward One on 10 March 2010 at 3/10/2010 01:52:00 pm.
So basically I'm down in the dumps today because
a) I'm exhausted
b) I haven't had any humor therapy in weeks
c) My tutor hates my thesis proposal (thanks for telling me 1 week before I'm supposed to hand in a pre-draft)
d) I'm behind on work
e) I'm behind on my last ditch effort at Animal Peeps magazine
f) I haven't been to the gym in weeks thanks to tendonitis
However, at least the cops haven't come after me.
"The COPS?" you ask.... "Why would the cops come after you?" Well! Allow me to explain!
So it's my birthday, and we're at the hash, and it turns into a first-class SNAFU and general adventure into WTF-Land. First of all, the hares of the day set a horrible trail, which resulted in the absolute worst-case-Hash-scenario of the sun going down so that the trail can't be seen and people getting lost. There's Major Feckup 1.
Enter Major Feckup 2. Said lost people leave angry, once they get "un-lost". All this on my watch as Grand Mattress. Nobody blaming me, however, since I wasn't the hare for the day. Whew.
On to Major Feckup 3. Said run had been set from the start point of empty public car park. Making our after-run socializing just a wee bit illegally located. Now, mind you, this is a commonplace and everyday occurrence with the Hash (most of our runs are set from public places), not to mention the fact that half of G-city is ALWAYS, WITHOUT FAIL, 100% of the time, creating general drunken chaos out on the streets and public spaces of the city until the wee hours of the morning, and generally disturb the peace at all costs. What *we* do is have one bottle of water or a light beer and some social chatter, and go home. So naturally you can understand why 30 cops roll up in about 10 vehicles and bust us before any drinks are even consumed???? NOT! Whatever. I'm not one to condone breaking the law, and yes, we were in an abandoned parking lot - technically public space. So whatever. What gets the RETARDO OF THE YEAR award however, is that they rolled up, confiscated our very expensive coolerboxes full of soft drinks, water, and beer, and "asked" everyone to come down to the cop shop. And I am not sarcastically using the word "asked". Literally. ASKED. So obviously as part of the Mismanagement team, The Mr. and I decided (felt obligated) that we better accompany the 10 or so devout members that decided to round up a posse and head down to the cop shop to get our cooler boxes back. Obviously no one was concerned about getting the book thrown at us BECAUSE NO ONE HAD EVEN BEGUN DRINKING YET when the fuzz arrived! Therefore obviously no one could get in trouble for drinking. (In BW law, it is not illegal to have a coolerbox full of beer sitting out in a parking lot. The illegal part is when you drink it. If these fools were at least 10% smart they would've at least waited til someone cracked a damn beer open! Nevermind the fact that 10metres away there was some sort of drunken brawl going on in another parking lot between CLEARLY DRUNKEN, BEER-DRINKING LOCAL GUYS). Whatever. Knowing we were all 100% innocent, a gaggle of us decided there was a better chance of getting our stuff back if a large number of us showed up at the cop shop OF OUR OWN VOILITION to sort the shizzle out.
Not to be. They wanted our personal details (why?) and wanted us to all sign guilty forms (why?) and wanted us to all cooperate in a full-scale investigation (of WHAT?) blah blah blah. Obviously none of us were going to do that crap, and spent the rest of the night in the station arguing with people who didn't have a damn clue about the law or how to do their copping. What they WANTED was to bust a bunch of white folk and confiscate a bunch of drinks so they could have a full blown piss-up after they knocked off for the evening. Welcome to the 3rd world. Feckers.
Finally we all just gave them some random personal info (you can guess yourself if any of it was factual or not) and signed a bunch of benign crap and left. Happy freakin b-day to me! Not to mention I've got LJJ here the whole time and now it's what - 2 hours past her bedtime? And a freakin wet diaper? Anyway. Apparently no one has been followed up on, to date, so I guess someone from the actual super-ranks finally talked some sense into the 14-year-old officers in question the next day. What I imagine went something like "was anyone ACTUALLY drinking?" and "do you have any PROOF?" and "you realize there are robberies and domestic assaults going on right now?" or whatever to that effect, and hopefully that's the end of it.
Freakin circus.
In other (positive) news, I didn't hear anything else from the Australian Immigration Nazis, which I take as a good sign that LJJ will most likely get her 2-week-visitors visa. Simple friggin pleasures, like.
a) I'm exhausted
b) I haven't had any humor therapy in weeks
c) My tutor hates my thesis proposal (thanks for telling me 1 week before I'm supposed to hand in a pre-draft)
d) I'm behind on work
e) I'm behind on my last ditch effort at Animal Peeps magazine
f) I haven't been to the gym in weeks thanks to tendonitis
However, at least the cops haven't come after me.
"The COPS?" you ask.... "Why would the cops come after you?" Well! Allow me to explain!
So it's my birthday, and we're at the hash, and it turns into a first-class SNAFU and general adventure into WTF-Land. First of all, the hares of the day set a horrible trail, which resulted in the absolute worst-case-Hash-scenario of the sun going down so that the trail can't be seen and people getting lost. There's Major Feckup 1.
Enter Major Feckup 2. Said lost people leave angry, once they get "un-lost". All this on my watch as Grand Mattress. Nobody blaming me, however, since I wasn't the hare for the day. Whew.
On to Major Feckup 3. Said run had been set from the start point of empty public car park. Making our after-run socializing just a wee bit illegally located. Now, mind you, this is a commonplace and everyday occurrence with the Hash (most of our runs are set from public places), not to mention the fact that half of G-city is ALWAYS, WITHOUT FAIL, 100% of the time, creating general drunken chaos out on the streets and public spaces of the city until the wee hours of the morning, and generally disturb the peace at all costs. What *we* do is have one bottle of water or a light beer and some social chatter, and go home. So naturally you can understand why 30 cops roll up in about 10 vehicles and bust us before any drinks are even consumed???? NOT! Whatever. I'm not one to condone breaking the law, and yes, we were in an abandoned parking lot - technically public space. So whatever. What gets the RETARDO OF THE YEAR award however, is that they rolled up, confiscated our very expensive coolerboxes full of soft drinks, water, and beer, and "asked" everyone to come down to the cop shop. And I am not sarcastically using the word "asked". Literally. ASKED. So obviously as part of the Mismanagement team, The Mr. and I decided (felt obligated) that we better accompany the 10 or so devout members that decided to round up a posse and head down to the cop shop to get our cooler boxes back. Obviously no one was concerned about getting the book thrown at us BECAUSE NO ONE HAD EVEN BEGUN DRINKING YET when the fuzz arrived! Therefore obviously no one could get in trouble for drinking. (In BW law, it is not illegal to have a coolerbox full of beer sitting out in a parking lot. The illegal part is when you drink it. If these fools were at least 10% smart they would've at least waited til someone cracked a damn beer open! Nevermind the fact that 10metres away there was some sort of drunken brawl going on in another parking lot between CLEARLY DRUNKEN, BEER-DRINKING LOCAL GUYS). Whatever. Knowing we were all 100% innocent, a gaggle of us decided there was a better chance of getting our stuff back if a large number of us showed up at the cop shop OF OUR OWN VOILITION to sort the shizzle out.
Not to be. They wanted our personal details (why?) and wanted us to all sign guilty forms (why?) and wanted us to all cooperate in a full-scale investigation (of WHAT?) blah blah blah. Obviously none of us were going to do that crap, and spent the rest of the night in the station arguing with people who didn't have a damn clue about the law or how to do their copping. What they WANTED was to bust a bunch of white folk and confiscate a bunch of drinks so they could have a full blown piss-up after they knocked off for the evening. Welcome to the 3rd world. Feckers.
Finally we all just gave them some random personal info (you can guess yourself if any of it was factual or not) and signed a bunch of benign crap and left. Happy freakin b-day to me! Not to mention I've got LJJ here the whole time and now it's what - 2 hours past her bedtime? And a freakin wet diaper? Anyway. Apparently no one has been followed up on, to date, so I guess someone from the actual super-ranks finally talked some sense into the 14-year-old officers in question the next day. What I imagine went something like "was anyone ACTUALLY drinking?" and "do you have any PROOF?" and "you realize there are robberies and domestic assaults going on right now?" or whatever to that effect, and hopefully that's the end of it.
Freakin circus.
In other (positive) news, I didn't hear anything else from the Australian Immigration Nazis, which I take as a good sign that LJJ will most likely get her 2-week-visitors visa. Simple friggin pleasures, like.
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