My Year of Meaningful (2011)

Ah, friday.

Tonight we go to Soo & Mx for dinner. Their little'un is turning 1 today and in an act that could've totally come out of my own repertoire, they be havin' a nice adult dinner party after the littley goes to bed to celebrate it, instead of some jacked up kiddie party (of the sort we just attended last sunday - ugh). Seriously, would a 1-year old even know? NO! Rather wine and dine your friends to toast to making it through a year without seriously harming the baby!

Then tomorrow night (Sat.) there is a big ol' fancy-pants co-birthday party for the two swedish boys - our swedish friend (I'll call him "Sting", since initials are beginning to bore me) and this other swedish guy who is a friend of Sting's who The Mr. sometimes plays tennis with. We'll call him Gustav. On the surface, said co-birthday party sounds like a real blast, even a fancy-pants dress code and sit-down dinner with like 60 people at Gustav & Mrs. Gustav's place, a mix of Sting & Gustav's friends all mixed together. Ok, granted, they run in a similar circle so the guests are likely to overlap the boundaries of "his" and "his" friends but still, I like mix & match parties (especially when it's going to be largely Swedes! They're largely funny!). Anyhoo, the problem is that The Mr. really REALLY DOES NOT LIKE Gustav and quite frankly I agree that he's an arrogant egomaniac with a condescending attitude who knows how good looking he is and makes sure he uses it as an excuse to be a Real Aloof Dick! (There should be a name for that syndrome. I'll just call it RAD syndrome for now.) But we're going for Sting, not for Gustav, so who cares! I think The Mr. is just worried that we get the babysitter, we get all dolled up, we drive way the hell up to the north side of the city, we get excited about a big par-tay and then after all that effort, it turns out that 3/4 of the people there are assholes and we don't get to hang out with Sting and Mrs. Sting or anyone else we know/like anyway, making the whole thing an overrated bust. It's not just a stroll down the hill like going to Jac & Mar's place or (the no-longer-with-us) K. & H.... when you conjure up that much effort for a damn party, you want it to be a good damn party!!!

But to hell with concerns of that variety! We gwine partyin!!

Now! In news from the AWESOME Department, the best thing EVER is happening to our social life.... Doc & Mrs. Doc are moving into K & H's old place!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Clearly it's going to take some explanation as to why this is so freaking GREAT, but it's kinda a long story. The jist of which is that Doc & Mrs Doc currently live out AT the hospital that they're contracted to here in BW for this year-long contract. Said hospital is the new fancy-pants private number out in the middle of nowhere about 30 minutes from the city. Sure, they get free digs there and are surrounded (literally - like in apartment blocks) by other like-minded 1st world doctors who are nice folk, up for a bit of adventure in the ol' dark continent, and into helping start up a new fancy-pants private hospital out of the goodness of their hearts. But living so close to work means they're constantly picking up other doctors' shifts and swapping days and saying "what the hell, I'll take an extra shift" and whatever. I mean why not? they're in a strange new country with nothing else to do and live 30seconds' walk from the job. -sigh- what a drag.

so anyway, when they came over to our little oasis of paradise for The Mr.'s birthday braai a few weeks ago they fell in love with our tranquil, rustic-y, neighbourhood and promptly called Herr Landlord to see if there were any other places available - it's not too far from the hospital (20min drive without traffic) and yet closer to the city to be able to feel like you're not ostrich-sized from civilization, and also there's US there, and Jac & Mar there (who they also met that day), and the best part: NO OTHER CO-WORKERS living on top of them! So we fully supported this decision, but when Herr Landlord said "there's only K&H's place and I want you to pay 9k per month for it" it was a bit touch and go. Mind you we only pay 6.5k for ours, which is a nicer place even! But this was a flat out case of extortion because the extorted party were clearly doctors and thus our money-grubbing landlord thought he could make a quick buck. Also, he uses the leverage that they will only be around for another 10 months, and he'd rather work in year-long-leases. AND he just got burned by K&H flying the coop so mysteriously.

WELL! Lucky for us, our new mates are the type that put "quality of life" in front of "saving money in africa" and took the offer anyway!!! After a tense week of failed attempts at negotiating with the Herr, and wavering back and forth. I like to think it's the presence of myself and The Mr. and LJJ a quick 2-minute walk (or 5 minute drunken stumble) up the hill that really sucked 'em in. Plus Jac loves to play poker and so does Doc so there is also a new opportunity for non-hospital related quality of life for Doc & Mrs Doc. It's gonna be stellar! McCartney even! Perhaps I must also decide to learn this "poker" they speak of.

File this one under the catagory of "secret babies" - So basically, our golden boy at the office, Leto, is going to be a dad. Now. How do we know this? Simple, actually: You drive 10 hours out into the Kalahari to GHZ-town, for a slew of public meetings and field work for a project. You go to the only ATM in town and take out some money. You hear someone behind you say "Hi, there.... how are you? How's LJJ?" and you turn around and see (of all friggin people in all the gin joints in the world) Leto's girlfriend TT (of 12 years and essentially common-law wife although currently geographically seperated due only to her job) standing behind you.... with a rather rotund midsection. You think "hmmm, she's put on a bit of weight... must be all that "being posted as a nurse out in the middle of nowhere 100km away from GHZ-town for the last year and eating nothing but goat and starch". UNTIL, 2 of her acquaintences (obviously) come running up to her squaking over her "baby belly" and rubbing her tum-tum and grilling her about how many months away until "the baby comes"!!!! WHOOOPSIEDAISIES!!

Fast forward back to the office. Two weeks ago. That would be one week since "the incident". Still no word from Leto. Well now, this is mysterious, isn't it? Does he not KNOW? Did she not TELL HIM? Surely by now the word has spread from TT to L. that the "cat" is out of the "bag" and said when I say "cat" I mean "Leto's lil' soldiers" and when I say "bag" I mean "and into TT's belly"!! Apparently that is NOT the case, we find out. How do we find out? Well OBVIOUSLY..... through Ed! Who, upon seeing L. after our GHZ-trip gives him the heads up that "TT's been spotted carrying your spawn!! Dude! The "cat" is out of the "bag".... whereby this time when I say "cat" I mean "news" and when I say "bag" I mean "loudspeakers that are your girlfriends' friends' mouths!" (which of course he already knew, as TT had called him immediately upon "the great ATM incident of 2010" taking place) But obviously we're not going to say anything until we're told PERSONALLY by our favourite employee and uncle to our own little pine nut. That would just be WRONG wouldn't it..... "Hey buddy, thanks for not telling us you knocked up your gf and are gonna be a pops soon and will probably be expecting time off and a big lunch out and all our baby hand-me-downs and the like!!!" So we wait. For the news. To come to him. So we can get this damn elephant out of the damn reception area.

And thus the game of psychological chicken begins. 3 weeks pass. Stories about babies are told around the coffee table. Hints are dropped by Me & The Mr. about how nice it would be to see TT again next time she comes to town. Leading questions are asked. He stonewalls us. DOH! BASTARD! Something's gotta give. I JUST CANT TAKE ANY MORE! And neither can The Mr. ..... who cracked. Finally. Cracked. Had L. in the office by himself the other day and gave him the "so, is there anything you'd like to tell me?" speech.... which broke the dam and the whole 9 came out.

Basically, he was given an ultimatum by TT and it was "baby now or i'm out" so they bred the thing on purpose, even though HE wanted to wait til she was done with her post out in the middle of nowhere and they could get married etc. So I'm kinda disappointed in her because the whole decision making process was very one-sided and largely manipulated and pushed by her family (it's a cultural thing.... you gotta make the babies and lots of 'em, early too) and left no say whatsoever to the future dad. He was afraid we would grill him and give him the reprimands and judgements and alllll that stuff. Which is what HIS family did when he told THEM. So for the past 5 months (yes, she is OVER 5months in the oven now) he's been sitting on this and it's been festering in his belly and he's been losing sleep over not telling us and what what what, but just couldn't bring himself to do it. Especially knowing that we have this crazy notion in our heads that if you plan on raising a kid with your life partner, it's probably better for the kid if you're not half a country away from each other.

The kicker though, is that he STILL hasn't told me. Which means, after his conv. with The Mr. he KNOWS that I know, and I know that HE knows that I know... but still not a word has been uttered. This is just getting ridiculous but I will still maintain my silence until he's ready to talk about it, because I dont want to be this pushy boss who gets involved in his personal life if he doesn't want me to. But still. Damn! Get it out already! I got free stuff for you if you do, dude!!!