My Year of Meaningful (2011)

Seriously, how far do we go with the positivity sentiment of 2010?

My goal pretty much lies on the "if you can't say something nice, put a sock in it" side, and stays there.  But here's a doozy of a contentious issue in which I'm tempted to not say something nice, but putting a sock in it could have equal adverse impacts on a friendship...

Allow me to explain:

I should've saved the email, but it was just bugging me too much, seeing the subject title in my inbox.
Right, so like a week ago, my friend Crazy E of DC sends out this mass email (personally that already annoyed me), subject headed:  "Urgent, Please reply, Your cooperation is needed" or something like that.  Then in mass email lingo it was pretty much like (I'm paraphrasing here, since I deleted it) "if you're receiving this email it's because I want to re-enter the fed govt after my contract here is up, and you or someone you know is not a US citizen.  I am required to turn over this information for all non-citizens that I am linked to so that they can check that you are not a terrorist or on some watch list.  So, can you please send me the following information:
- full name
- address
-country of citizenship
- employers name
-address
-date of birth
etc
etc
etc

I can't remember the whole list.  But anyway then the "personal p.s.es" were at the bottom.  It was like an addendum in bullet points:

• Bob, can you send me this info for Sue
• Joe, can you send me this info for Liz
• Leroy can you send me this info for Bubba
• Oh wayward one, can you send me this info for The Mr.

etc etc  (obviously the list of names were those of us who are lucky enough to be married to, or related to, or WHATEVER to non-citizens).

OK this just annoys me on so many levels.  Nevermind the fact that I have some outrageous libertarian political beliefs but quite frankly I'm just uncomfortable with this!!  But just for the record, here are JUST A FEW of the levels that I'm uncomfortable with this on:

1. Mass, impersonal email asking ME for a favor... um HELLO, am I the only one who is picking up a twitch or facial tick whilst reading this?  OK I realize you know a lot of international people and sending each of them this email would be cumbersome for you, but come on, a little sneaky cut n' pasting instead of MASS MAIL wouldnt kill you, right?
2. Obviously, *I* am a US citizen, so since you don't need this info from me, and rather for my husband, would it not be prudent to email me asking for HIS email address instead of assuming I am his private secretary?
3. The SUBJECT HEADER of this email is like "drop everything you're doing, 'cuz it's ME TIME!!"
4. I really REALLY hate the idea of Big Brother harvesting personal details of those who are not its citizens under the guise of "your friend is relying on you giving him/her this info for their carreer". I don't believe in it, and it SUCKS.
5. Not once in the email is there any sort of "opt out" option, and that really pisses me off.

OK so there are 5 (out of many more) things that annoyed me the first time I received the email.... (yes, wait for it...)  and while I was spending a few days hashing out my ethics and my capacity to live The Spirit of 2010 and my beliefs, I receive a 2nd email from Crazy E of DC.  (again, this is paraphrased because I deleted it)
"Oh Wayward One can I ask you AGAIN to PLEASE hurry up and send me this info for The Mr.? I've already gotten 47 of my required responses and am waiting on you"...

No, that is NOT the exact wording, and there were no capital letters involved, but since I can't go back and cut/paste, that's just me re-visiting the sentiment of it.  (and yes, the number of responses returned was mentioned, and was 47).

OK so now I'm REALLY annoyed.  I'm starting to think of it less like "it's not the end of the world and this person is my friend so I should help them and just do it", and more like "OY! WTF! If I was a devout muslim and I came to your house for dinner and you were serving non-halaal meat, I would NOT EAT IT!"  As in, this really offends my Anti-big-brother beliefs and my outrageous belief in privacy protection!!  And I still haven't come up with an admirable way to deal with it that A) is in the spirit of 2010 (i.e. not zipping back with a "Screw you and your damn potential job!" or just "Homie don't play dat!")  and B) doesn't screw my friend out of a job and C) doesn't piss them off.

So I leave it for 2 days and stew. 

But then I realize I'm stewing.

And stewing is DEFINITELY not in the Spirit of 2010.

Because the more I stew, the more the negative thoughts wrap themself around my brain and start squeezing. The more I wake up in the middle of the night writhing in sheer pissed-off'edness.

So today I decided my plan of attack (inappropriate wording, I know) would be a passive email and an "option D: none of the above".   So I wrote this:
-------------------------------------
You can ask him yourself
mailto:Mr@whatever%20dot%20com

I don't believe in harvesting personal details for big brother's spying purposes!

(Sorry for the delay in response - my iPhone wasnt cooperating with my gmail and I haven't been in the office for ages).

-me
-----------------------------------

OK so there it is.  Passive, brief, sock-in-it, and topped off with a little white lie that says "I wasn't trying to be a beeyatch, it was out of my control".  -sigh-

So ultimately, there's my attempt at compromise: I've opened a door so that the info needed can be got (through the channel that SHOULD have been used the first time, IMHO), but I'm not compromising my own convictions in the process, since I still WANT to be a good friend, and yes, I know, a good friend does favors even when not over the moon about it.  And yes, I know a good friend does not do the Little White (Lie) Band-Aid thing...

ugh, I'm not good at this.  It's easier just to be a jerk.

But let it be known.... about 5 days have passed, and there has been no response - not to me OR The Mr.
Hmmm.

But I haven't been stewing anymore.  Maybe that's because the in-laws were here and I'm just too busy (& sick) to stew?  I don't know!

Labels: The spirit of 2010